1、四六级作文四六级作文漫画作文漫画作文 People are crossing the street looking at their cell phones and using walking sticks to see.开头难开头难 出现问题:出现问题:.有些同学第一段太过冗长,不少同学直接有些同学第一段太过冗长,不少同学直接引用漫画原话。引用漫画原话。.描述漫画时,有些同学时态使用错误。描述漫画时,有些同学时态使用错误。.有些同学只是描述了漫画但却没有引出漫有些同学只是描述了漫画但却没有引出漫画的内涵。画的内涵。学生佳作 Nowadays, more and more people use
2、 mobile phones without restraint(无所忌惮(无所忌惮地)地). They often use it in all occasions. In the comic, they use the mobile phones while crossing the road. Its too crazy.(顾薇薇)(顾薇薇) From the drawing we can easily identify what the author intend to convey. The increasing use of mobile phones can do harm to
3、our lives. (吴佳凤)吴佳凤) As the drawing presents, there is a man walking across the street absorbedly(全神(全神贯注地)贯注地) focusing on his cell phone without noticing the surroundings. This sort of phenomenon is not uncommon in some metropolis(大都市)(大都市), especially among the youngsters. You should start your e
4、ssay with a brief description of the picture and then express your views on the importance of doing small things before undertaking something big. You should write at least 120 words but no more than 180 words.Dad, I am a bit worried about disposing of nuclear weapon. If you can empty the dustbin, y
5、ou can do anything. The Importance of Doing Small Things Before Undertaking Something BigPara 1 This is a thought-provoking(引人深思的)(引人深思的) cartoon: a young guy tells his father that he is a bit worried about disposing of nuclear waste; however, his father informs the guy of a truth: if one can empty
6、the dustbin, he can do anything(用自己的语言重新陈述)用自己的语言重新陈述). For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write an essay, you should start your essay with a brief description of the picture and then express your views on the importance of learning basic skills. No offense, but by the time were in the job
7、 market, wont that stuff be outdated With the development of society, some students think basic knowledge is not useful. The picture reflects that some students begin to question the significance of learning basic knowledge and skills(用自己的语言总(用自己的语言总结)结). 语言问题语言问题1.词性使用错误词性使用错误2.搭配错误搭配错误3.句子成分残缺句子成分
8、残缺4.中式英语中式英语问题一:分不清一些单词的词性问题一:分不清一些单词的词性We enjoy the technology which bring us convenient.(改为改为 convenience)As far as I am concern(+ed), play phone in the class must make students not pay attention to what the teachers said.When you are boring(改为(改为bored), you could chat with your friends.问题二:搭配错误问题
9、二:搭配错误 With the development of science and technology, more and more mobile phones arising(arise一般和一般和problems 搭配)改为搭配)改为 have been produced. We must focus on reduce use cell phone everywhere.(改为(改为focus on reducing using) Focus on doing Reducing doing 问题三:句子成分残缺问题三:句子成分残缺 But many people think that
10、 mobile phone (is) harmful, also some people think that(mobile phone is) good. (By)Using the phone we can read the news, messages and play games.问题四:中式英语问题四:中式英语 old persons-改为改为old people 或或 the elderly 其他问题其他问题 more and more fast more and more(不建议使用)(不建议使用) people=an increasing number/ amount of p
11、epople a growing number/amount of people(推荐使用)推荐使用)提高篇:用词应具体生动提高篇:用词应具体生动 With the booming(蓬勃发展)蓬勃发展) of information technology, various electronic products have been ubiquitous(无处不在)无处不在).大学大学英语四级英语四级写作中常用的形容词替换词写作中常用的形容词替换词。 1明显的:明显的:obvious=apparent=evident=manifest 2优秀的:优秀的:excellent=eminent=top
12、=outstanding 3惊人的:惊人的:surprising=amazing=extraordinary=miraculous 4消极的,不良的:消极的,不良的:bad=detrimental=baneful=undesirable 5美丽的:美丽的:beautiful=attractive=gorgeous=eye-catching 6积极的,好的:积极的,好的:good=beneficial=advantageous 7贫穷的:贫穷的:poor=needy=impoverished=poverty-stricken 8有活力的:有活力的:energetic=dynamic=vigoro
13、us 9健康的:健康的:healthy=robust=sound=wholesome 10富裕的:富裕的:rich=wealthy=affluent=well-to-do=well-off 11流行的:流行的:popular=prevailing=pervasiveGrammar 句子开头不用动词原形而用动词句子开头不用动词原形而用动词ing形式形式(祈使句除外)祈使句除外) 情态动词后用动词原形情态动词后用动词原形 介词后用名词或动词介词后用名词或动词ing形式形式(in,on,at,by,for,with,about,into, against)论证中出现的问题论证中出现的问题 1.论证太
14、单薄,缺乏论据。论证太单薄,缺乏论据。 2.论证逻辑模糊。论证逻辑模糊。提高篇:论证应生动形象,具有提高篇:论证应生动形象,具有内涵内涵 范例:范例: We cant live without basic skills. The building without foundation will collapse. Basic skills usually reflect the wisdom of people.(这些范例用词不难但却生动有力)这些范例用词不难但却生动有力)关于关于basic skills 重要性的漫画重要性的漫画建议把建议把30分钟的时间分成三部分分钟的时间分成三部分1.准备
15、时间准备时间(5分钟分钟) 先审题。然后进行一个提纲和内容的构思,想清楚自己文章的大致结先审题。然后进行一个提纲和内容的构思,想清楚自己文章的大致结构,是否需要举例说明等等。构,是否需要举例说明等等。2.撰写时间撰写时间(20分钟分钟) (1)如无把握,宁愿写简单句也不写长难句。如无把握,宁愿写简单句也不写长难句。 (2)卷面整洁。如果一不小心写错单词,千万不要涂黑,一笔划掉就卷面整洁。如果一不小心写错单词,千万不要涂黑,一笔划掉就好。好。3.检查时间检查时间(5分钟分钟)主要检查以下三个点:主要检查以下三个点:(1)拼写是否正确。拼写是否正确。(2)用词和搭配是否正确。用词和搭配是否正确。(3)语法是否正确。主要是人称、时态、语态是否正确,有没有出现语法是否正确。主要是人称、时态、语态是否正确,有没有出现本应用过去时态却用的是现在时,动词的三人称单复数是否用正确了。本应用过去时态却用的是现在时,动词的三人称单复数是否用正确了。
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