1、Sharing Sharing 续写讲评续写讲评 Tips for continuation writing注意卷面整洁，书写清晰注意卷面整洁，书写清晰清爽的卷面让改卷清爽的卷面让改卷老师耳目一新！老师耳目一新！两段词数要差不多！两段词数要差不多！两段词数为两段词数为150150左右左右没有第一段，直接写第二段，原则上没有第一段，直接写第二段，原则上不给分不给分！有第一段，没有第二段，有第一段，没有第二段，满分为满分为12.512.5!使用原文的至少使用原文的至少5 5个关键词！需要个关键词！需要下划线下划线！不是波浪线！也不是双横线！不是波浪线！也不是双横线！、原则上一段话里面不再分段！原则
2、上一段话里面不再分段！不要使用过多（无意义）的对话！不要使用过多（无意义）的对话！原则上不出现原文中未提到的人物！原则上不出现原文中未提到的人物！Read for plotA workmanA womanFree？Love?Special?Read for plotA workmanA womanFree？Love?Special?The smell of her blossoms so filled with the air with sweetness that it seemed to take away the tiredness in his bones and lift his s
3、pirits.He had never experienced such wonder from the many blooms of his own garden.the smell of them refreshed the soulthey still performed their fantastic magic.such remarkable relaxation from tiredness,such comfort in sadness,such spiritual nourishment as those remarkable flowers provided.What was
4、 special about the flowers?So the man filled his arms with blossoms and hurried joyfully home.In order not to lose his valuable possession,the man planted the blossoms in a small plot of land behind his house.the man over and over warned them against carelessness and wild play for fear that they wal
5、k on the flowers and damage them.With the news spreading and more people coming to appreciate his treasure,the man became even more concerned about his remarkable flowers.He was determined to protect the flowers.Did he love the flowers?Develop the plotParagraph 1He was determined to protect the flow
6、ers._ Paragraph 2However,the flowers seemed to fade day by day,so the man went everywhere for help._What would he do to protect the flowers?set rulesbuild wallswarn childrentake more care of the flowersWhy did the flower fade away?Where would the man get help?What does the story want to tell us?A.(p
7、ara.2)However,the flowers seemed to fade day by day,so the man went everywhere for help.The man asked lots of people for help,but no one can solve this problem.Three days later,the women who gave the flower to the man,happened to come to his house to see the flowers.When seeing the dying flowers,the
8、 woman said gently to the man,“You take too much care of the flowers.They are magic flowers not common one,so they should live in natural environment.”Hearing this,the man realized that he should not overprotect the flower.Which ending is reasonable?B.(para.2)However,the flowers seemed to fade day b
9、y day,so the man went everywhere for help.Every evening the workman would go to that road where he met the woman but waited nothing.One day,when he was crying in the garden,a woman appeared.She said“Can I appreciate your flowers?”The workman wanted to refuse but found she was the woman he met that e
10、vening.The man said“I am sorry for destroying your gift.”The woman smiled“The flowers were not only watered by water but also by heart and love.”The workman was inspired by womans words and started to water them by love and kindness.The flowers became charming again.Which ending is reasonable?(para.
11、2)However,the flowers seemed to fade day by day,so the man went everywhere for help.Exhausted and hopeless,he managed to find the woman who gave him flowers.The woman said gently,“Theres no magic in my flower.What exactly make it seem magical is sharing.”Hearing that,the man realized his mistake and
12、 threw away the warning sign immediately.From then on,more and more people restarted to come to appreciate the remarkable flowers,and the mans garden was full of joyfulness again.Which ending is reasonable?Polish the languageI.I.利用非谓语利用非谓语1.He didnt feel satisfied.He even set a warning board in his
13、garden,saying“no entry”.2.He saw his beloved flowers dying.He felt very anxious.3.He saw the flower was in full bloom again.He felt delighted.Not feeling satisfied,he even set a warning board in his garden,saying“no entry”.Seeing his beloved flowers dying,he felt very anxious.Seeing the flower was i
14、n full bloom again,he felt delighted.II.II.利用形容词利用形容词1.He didnt know what else he could do to save the flowers.He felt exhausted and depressed.Exhausted and depressed,he didnt know what else he could do to save the flowers.III.添加情感添加情感/神态神态/心理描写心理描写1.He saw his beloved flowers dying.He felt very anx
15、ious.Seeing his beloved flowers dying,he felt on pins and needles.Seeing his beloved flowers dying,he felt anxious with a flood of depression welling up in his mind.心理描写心理描写4.He saw his beloved flowers dying.He felt very depressed.Seeing his beloved flowers dying,he felt like he was floating in an o
16、cean of sadness.III.添加情感添加情感/神态神态/心理描写心理描写2.He saw the flower was in bloom again.He felt delighted.The man was wild with joy on seeing the flowers was in bloom again.Amusement gleamed in his eyes when he saw the flowers was in bloom again.神态描写神态描写神态描写神态描写情感描写情感描写Seeing the flower was in bloom again,
17、he felt delighted with a satisfied look on his face.V.点明主旨的句式点明主旨的句式1.最终，他明白了这些花没有魔力，分享才有魔力。(It dawned on sb that)It dawned on him that the flowers didnt have magic but sharing did.One possible version(1)He was determined to protect the flowers.So he built a high wall around them.Not feeling satisfi
18、ed,he even set up rules as to who could enter the garden,how they must enter,and what they must follow while they were there.As a result,children were forbidden to enter and appreciate the flowers as before.For his part,he continued to see to it that his treasure received enough sunlight and water s
19、o that the flowers continued to perform their wonderful magic.However,the lowers seemed to fade day by day so the man went everywhere for help.He visited every expert,only to find his efforts in vain.He felt on pins and needles,seeing his beloved flowers dying.One evening,he was wandering on the street aimlessly when he suddenly noticed the flower woman on the same spot where he had met her,giving away her amazing flowers.It finally dawned on him that the flowers are gifts not possessions and that only by sharing can the magic remain and last.Share love！Share happiness！Share kindness！
